We Are Beset Abound By Beasts That Growl

I have lost my step-father of 21 years and known much longer into my young teen years before he and my Mother married at my behest and begging so as to not have to experience she and my real Father reconciling once again or ever again as it were.

Instead, I saw a man, not too keen on the kids part of the package, but loving her enough to change himself enough to allow us into his circle.

Slowly and yet surely, he became closer and closer.

His own children always seemed to resent the re-marriage and the involvement his new wife's children had in their lives. We would stay there from time to time but we didn't break rules. They broke rules unfortunately and as much as I would've like to see them given enough room to fail, it was decided when they failed to a high degree in Mom and her husband's mind they had to move out. This created resentment as WE, the children of the new wife seemed to always be able to stay and I don't know if they understood we followed the rules and didn't rock the boat at all if possible.

Regardless, it was sad as I know how much my Pop, Jim, I called him Pop or Dad sometimes after my own father died 5 years ago telling him he was stuck with it cuz he was all I had left. He just smiled.

He was never one to go too far out of his way to be sure YOU were comfortable. He didn't feel it was his job to do so. He felt you should feel okay by your own self and not need someone from the outside to let you know you are okay. It's called Ego Stroking and he didn't require to give it often.

He was a very private man but we talked quite a bit about science, books, physics, you name it. We loved to talk as we would smoke occasionally. There were times where I could barely follow the convo but it was nice to have the time with him.

Here lately, he was slowly losing weight and just didn't look well but refused to go to a doctor. Mom said the night before he died one of his feet was purplish in color and his face red. If I had known that I could've forced him into care and caught the Aortic Aneurism that was just waiting for another 12 hours while he was Kroger's Grocery parking lot.

I cannot believe what a blow this has been and nothing was prepared. I pushed for it with both of them to at least get burial costs covered and a little more just for bills and such but they didn't listen.
I dunno what we're going to do as we were to move into a new apartment in the same complex, something long overdue and the least mgmt could do for what we've endured.

I will miss you Jim. I loved you for who you were and required nothing but you constant adoration of my Mother which you offered freely. You are a great sould, a good soldier and a good man.

I will miss you every day and I will watch over your girls as best I can.

Goodbye Jim, see you in time I guess.

Your stepson/son Joey.